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Wedding Wishes Part 3 - Funny Wishes and Quotes

Best first: "Love is an ideal thing, marriage is a real thing." – Johan Wolfgang Goethe
 Wedding Wishes

Funny Wedding Wishes, Quotes and Greetings!

Spouse: someone who will stand by you and walk with you through all the problems you wouldn’t have if you hadn’t married.
“I am” is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that “I do” is the longest sentence?” - George Carlin
"The bonds of matrimony are like any other bonds – they mature slowly." – Peter De Vries
Today it dawned on me that life just isn’t fair on single people like me. So far I’ve only had to buy one gift, once a year on your birthday. Now there’s two birthdays plus a wedding anniversary to get gifts for. This party had better be worth it!
"I’ve learned that no one is perfect until you fall in love with them." – Andy Rooney
When you marry somebody, it doesn’t mean you start owning them (just all their possessions).
Marriage is the process of finding out what type of a person your spouse would have preferred.
"To love and be loved is to feel the sun from both sides. "
– David Viscott
If you want the beautiful, blinding light of love in marriage, you should also learn to accept that where there is light, there are some shadows.
"Marriage has no guarantees. If that’s what you’re looking for, go live with a car battery. "
– Erma Bombeck
"You know you’re in love when you can’t fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams. "
– Dr. Seuss
Marriage is all about commitment. Then again, so is insanity. But since you’re both insane about each other, the place of commitment will most probably include a bedroom and that’s just fine.
"Marriage has many pains, but celibacy has no pleasures." – Samuel Johnson
Thank you for the free booze. My very best wishes for a long, happy and fun marriage!
"I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life." – Rita Rudner
"My most brilliant achievement was my ability to be able to persuade my wife to marry me." – Winston Churchill
"To keep your marriage brimming, with love in the loving cup, whenever you're wrong, admit it; whenever you're right, shut up." – Ogden Nash
"I have learned that only two things are necessary to keep one's wife happy. First, let her think she's having her own way. And second, let her have it." – Lyndon B. Johnson
The five most useful words in a happy marriage: “Yes, you are right, darling.”
When you get married, it’s like you’ve become a child, all over again. Be ready to learn where to put your socks, how to keep the bathroom tidy and how to hang your towel. Best wishes for all the amazing aspects of a loving marriage!
A word of advice to the Groom: We all know guys aren’t the best at always remembering key dates. So, the most effective way to really instill the date of your wedding anniversary in your head with rock-hard reliability is to forget about it… once!
"In every marriage more than a week old, there are grounds for divorce. The trick is to find, and continue to find, grounds for marriage." - Robert Anderson, in his book Solitaire & Double Solitaire
Let me say with Bill and Ted, 'Be excellent to each other.'
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Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3

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